Proof of the Qualities That We, as a Culture, Value in Standup Comedians -- by Jennifer Dziura (5/17/2007)
The type of jokes one often hears from standup comedians:
- So, I'm unemployed, but it's not so bad. Living at home has its perks -- I get free breakfast, and Mom never forgets to remind me what day the job ads come out. I don't think I want another job, though. There aren't a lot of opportunities for advancement in the dishwashing field.
The type of jokes one never hears from standup comedians:
- I just did my taxes. Everybody hates that, right? You know what really sucks? When your stock options finally vest, and you cash them in just to end up in a higher tax bracket! It's like you're being punished for making money! How much sense does that make?!
- I asked my secretary -- wait, no, I told my secretary -- to get me a pastrami on wheat, and you know what she came back with? A Reuben! It's so hard to find good help. Women can't even buy sandwiches these days.
- You know what sucks? When your investments are only making 16% -- but the year-to-date market index is up 22.45%! What does my broker think I mean by "aggressive investing" -- I want a savings account at North Fork? Where did he go to school, Cornell? I hear that school's half public!
